Dirty Dancing

I can’t believe what I just heard happened in my home state of North Carolina.

A 64-year-old woman has been awarded $275,000 after her town banned her from its weekly community dances. Rebecca Willis danced in short skirts, “simulating sexual intercourse with her partner, who hunched on the floor,” lawyers for the town of Marshall had alleged.

This week the town decided to settle her lawsuit, saying it had infringed upon her freedom of expression.

I wonder if Rebecca’s going to split that money with her dancing partner.

Jail Mail

It must be true because I read it in the tabloids. There is an escaped prisoner in Germany who mailed himself out of jail. This man, Hans Lang, who was serving time for drug offenses, allegedly hid himself inside a large Federal Express package of dirty sheets that was later picked up for delivery.

Once clear of the prison grounds, Lang exited the box, picked the lock on the door of the delivery truck, and disappeared into some woods in Dusseldorf. He has yet to be found.

Gives a whole new meaning to that saying: “Never air your dirty linen in public.”

Who needs sleep?

One of Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends is leaving him to marry a younger man. Hefner has announced that he will be giving her away at a very special wedding ceremony.

In the meantime, 82-year-old Hefner recently broke up with a second girlfriend and is now dating 19-year-old twins.

I do hope they’re getting enough sleep!

Happy Retirement, President Bush!

Haven’t heard anything about what President Bush’s plans are after he leaves the White House. I did read the other day that he doesn’t have to worry too much about getting another job. He leaves the White House with assets estimated at up to $21 million dollars.

He did tell biographer Robert Draper, “I’ll give some speeches just to replenish the ol’ coffers.”